Who Are You? Hufflepuff!

Mike was dicking around on Netflix, and somehow became immune to on-screen violence, gore and sex.  We talk about the SAW movie series, where we fit in movies and Mike tells the heartbreaking story about how he once had a scooter, before it was taken!

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-134.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:22am EST

Denmark Is Full Of Morons!

We talk about wearing trucker hats without irony by actually driving a long haul truck. We posit about the methods and mayhem of Clint Eastwood, and why under no circumstance should you steal his cake. Also, everything in Australia will try to kill you, including Mel Gibson.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-133.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:56am EST

No Power, No Responsibility

Ponder the merits of living over a bar or underneath a strip club, or maybe having a laundromat or Korean nail salon as your living room. The absurdity of living in a commercial property is discussed, as well as buying Star Wars toys at midnight.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

 

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-132.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:24am EST

Multiple Concussion Survivor

As a species, we have not evolved to the point wherein we can get smacked in the back of the head with a 2x4 and be fine. Godzilla is scarier in a city than on the beach. Mike really wants to find a way to monetize pouring salt on the wound and adding insult to injury.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-131.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:29am EST

Toy Stories At The NJCC

Special Guest: Tom Reed

*We apologize for the brief audio distortion later in the episode*

So, Mike had a big weekend, and he wants to tell you all about it. He officiated his first wedding, ran his first table at a vintage toy show, and he met Ron Simmons and Ted DeBiase. Hear all of these stories and more, as Mike also unveils his new Mexican Luchadore character and Tom craps on Florida Iowa and Rhode Island.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-130.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:15am EST

Faking An Injury For Fun And Profit!

Just like the title says, we talk about trying to get over on the man. From hiring disabled Disney Guides to pretending to be a senior citizen, we talk about all types of scam nonsense. Just beware of going to far, as you don't want hot garbage thrown at you!

Never accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-129.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:30am EST

Alternate Universe Living

The boys talk about living in a different world. No, not making their own world better, but jumping over to a fictional reality. Learn about the pros and cons of the many fictional universal destinations that they want to go to. Also, Mike objectifies Sully, and makes him feel weird.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-128.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:09am EST

Garage Cloning

This week, within the span of 40 minutes, Mike talks himself into and then back out of cloning himself. The guys talk about cloning, how to feed your clone street gang and all of the crimes you could probably get away with. So get up on the state of fictional garage cloning technology.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-127.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:56am EST

The Sexy Cupcake

We talk about Billy Joel, Barry Bonds and what it takes to break a record. Mike talks about his low grade narcissism, his dream of hair and driving backhoes with his dad. Also, the terrible legend of Mr. W is unveiled for the world.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-126.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:59am EST

Douche Priest For The Masses!

Mike is now legally ordained in 48 states and can marry the shit out of you! Learn about his plans for his post-relationship database, Sully's dream of Unicorn murder and wearing special helmets.

Never Accurate, Always Presumptuous!

EXPLICIT CONTENT! NOT FOR CHILDREN!

Direct download: Readings4Suckers-125.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:52am EST